How to Get Certified!!!

Posted: February 7, 2011 in Entertainment/Humour

Here i present the basic algorithms/steps to get success in certification exams!!
And now if you are thinking that the following few points will help you in certification, you are looking at wrong source, that is what I can say here!!!
Enjoy and who knows you too may achieve something by following these kind of algorithms!!!

1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lit place in front of your computer.

2. Log onto FACEBOOK and GOOGLE TALK(be sure to go on away!). Check your email as well.

3. Read over the Syllabus carefully, to make certain you understand it.

4. Walk down to the market and buy some cheese burger and chocolates to help you concentrate, cheese burger to feel good!!

5. Check your email as soon as you return back.

6. Call up a friend and ask if he/she wants to go to park to get some fresh air, Just to get settled down and ready to work.

7. When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lit place.

8. Read over the Syllabus again to make absolutely certain you understand it.

9. Check your FACEBOOK account and other profiles you don’t miss.

10. You know, you haven’t written to that girl who told you to write some stuff to her.
11. Look at your teeth in the bathroom mirror.
12. Grab some juice from kitchen.

13. Check yourFacebook account again. ANY OF THIS SOUND FAMILIAR YET?!

14. Chat with one of your friends about the future ie how to make the girl who ditched our friend look cheap.

15. Check your Facebook account once again.

16. Listen to your new mp3 and download some more.

17. Phone your friend{Studious one} and ask if he’s started studying yet. Exchange derogatory remarks about your professor who could have handed out the ‘cheat sheets’, the
course, the college, the world at large.

18. Walk to the shop and buy some popcorn. You’ve probably run out of everything in kitchen.

19. While you’ve got them you may as well buy newspaper and read sports page straight away to get disappointed at yet another defeat{YOU KNOW WHICH TEAM I AM TALKING ABOUT}

20. Check your FACEBOOK account again, if nothing is happening, update a sad staus update to shake up the people who think about you..

21. Check the newspaper listings to make sure you aren’t missing something truly worthwhile on TV.

22. Play some solitare and chess against computer.

23. Check out facebook.com.

24. Wash your hands.

25. Call up a friend to see how much they have done, probably haven’t started either.

26. Sit down and do some serious thinking about your plans for the future.

28. Check to see if facebook.com has been updated yet.

29. Check your email in the sent items to see if that girl got the mail, read it aloud and feel good, listen to your new mp3z{they should have been downloaded by now}.

30. You should be rebooting by now, assuming that windows is crashing on schedule.

31. Read over the syllabus one more time, just for heck of it.

32. Scoot your chair across the room to the window and watch the sunrise.

33. Lie face down on the floor and moan.

34. Punch the wall and break something.

35. Check facebook.com.

36. Mumble obscenities.

37. 5am – start googling about the topics present in syllabus, go through the hand notes and ‘cheat sheets’, that you downloaded.

38. Complain to everyone that you didn’t get any sleep because you had to apper in a very important exam.
39. Go to class, solve every question, and leave right away so you can take a nap.

Things actually were very much same on the day we all got IBM certifications!! CHEERS TO LIFE

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s